22Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
23For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
24Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
Yes, I admit I sound harsh here. Sisters, so many of us struggle with this issue. I would like to cover in more detail some of the reasons why.
Even those that have established that submission is required still seem to have issues with it. I have read many, many articles on this topic. Both in my journey to understanding that I needed to obey my husband, but also in the years since. They make statements like “I submit, but I am still an equal”. They make long elaborate articles on why they aren’t mindless. They state how to be submissive, but not be a doormat. They say it takes a strong woman to submit. They argue how they submit, but are not inferior. They may even say we should submit to each other.
What do these statements sound like? Ladies, they sound like 'the world' talking. They are crafted as not to offend and try to convince this world that submission isn’t what they think it is. They want it to be seen in a different softer light. They want respect.
Here is a scriptural fact though. The world will not love you, understand you, nor respect you. Why do you spin your wheels trying to get that accomplished? It isn’t going to happen unless you compromise the very word of God?! Stop trying to make the command to submission look “soft”. It is what it is. Yes it is patriarchal! Yes it is male dominant! So what?!
If that is the way God wants it I am okay with that. I love God and I trust that He knows best. If the world calls me a doormat for that, so be it.
The comment that it “takes a strong woman to submit”. Again, this is catering to the world. The Bible directly says that the woman is the WEAKER vessel. We have to accept that for what it is. We are who God made us to be, accept it with grace. Do not let your pride be your downfall.
John 17:14 I have given them thy word; and the world hath hated them, because they are not of the world, even as I am not of the world.
Let us not trouble ourselves with foolish and endless lists of “what if” questions. Simply trust God to guide your life. Trust your husband to lead. Most of the time you have to give that trust, before anything will start to happen. Likely you might even have years ahead of your before your husband feels you are able to really accept his leadership. You can’t correct in one day, a relationship of many years. You do have to start somewhere though.
How the husband treats the wife is often made into a condition of submission. Sisters point out the passage on the requirement that a husband is to love us as Christ loved the church. They may accuse that this part is often the “forgotten” portion. Then they go into great detail of how they feel the husband should treat them. Some even argue that if the husband isn’t living right, that they don’t have to obey.
One could even argue that when looking up the Greek definitions of the passage that even within group of men conversing that we should keep silence. Why do most women find this to be abhorrent as a concept? Culture, feminist upbringing, desire for their own say, pride, etc. There are many reasons, we often have different ones. It doesn’t matter really. What matters is are we looking at this command through the eyes of the Holy Spirit. When that is done, you like won’t find it so awful.
I Corinthians 14:34 Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience as also saith the law.
35And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church.
1Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;
2While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.
3Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;
4But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.
5For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:
6Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.
At one time, I struggled greatly too. I felt Paul was evil. He was simply a man of God of whom God chose to speak through. I do not believe he hated women. He just expected that they should keep their God given place in the headship order. (I Cor. 11)
If that is what God ordained, then should we not as daughters of a mighty God, simply be willing to accept our role, whatever it may be?! We should not struggle when the word is so clear!
Now all of this said, am I a perfect submitting wife that keeps silent in the appropriate times, and always addresses her husband as Master/Lord? No, I humbly and shamefully admit that I do not. I am still learning too, thus my passion for research on this topic. I am not a perfect example of how to be a wife. However, I am sincerely trying my utmost to be a biblically submissive wife. I do not have all the answers. I can only lean on God and my earthly Master to help guide me into the woman God created me to be.
Fortunately we have the Word of God to help guide us as well. I write this article as a plea for ladies to simply stop hating and ignoring what is so clearly commanded of us. Submit with a humble heart to your earthly Master, for the Lord has blessed you with him.
Blessings in Christ
3The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things;
4That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,
5To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.
Other thoughts to leave you with.....
These are definitions I looked up:
Meeknesstoward God is that disposition of spirit in which we accept His dealings with us as good, and therefore without disputing or resisting. In the OT, the meek are those wholly relying on God rather than their own strength to defend against injustice. Thus, meekness toward evil people means knowing God is permitting the injuries they inflict, that He is using them to purify His elect, and that He will deliver His elect in His time (Isa 41:17, Luk 18:1-8). Gentleness or meekness is the opposite to self-assertiveness and self-interest. It stems from trust in God's goodness and control over the situation. The gentle person is not occupied with self at all. This is a work of the Holy Spirit, not of the human will (Gal 5:23).
The to whom a person or thing belongs, about which he has power of deciding; master, lord
a) the possessor and disposer of a thing
1) the owner; one who has control of the person, the master
2) in the state: the sovereign, prince, chief, the Roman emperor
b) is a title of honour expressive of respect and reverence, with which servants greet their master
c) this title is given to: God, the Messiah
valuing by which the price is fixed
a) of the price itself
b) of the price paid or received for a person or thing bought or sold
2) honour which belongs or is shown to one
a) of the honour which one has by reason of rank and state of office which he holds
b) deference, reverence